Am I in Perimenopause? 5 Early Signs Most Women Miss (Especially at Work)
A woman with short, curly hair sits at a wooden table in a bright, modern workspace, focused on typing on a laptop.
If you’ve found yourself thinking, “Why is everything suddenly harder?” you’re not alone.
For a lot of women, perimenopause doesn’t arrive with a dramatic announcement. It creeps in quietly. It shows up in ways that are easy to explain away, especially when you’re busy, capable, and used to getting on with it.
And at work? It can be even easier to miss. Because when your confidence dips, your sleep goes off, and your brain feels a bit fuzzier than usual, the world doesn’t say “perimenopause.” It says “stress.” It says “burnout.” It says “you’ve got a lot on.”
This article is here to offer a different lens. Not a diagnosis, but a gentle way to sanity-check what you’re experiencing, spot patterns, and know what to do next.
First, what is perimenopause?
Perimenopause is the transition phase before menopause, when your hormones start fluctuating and your body responds differently. For many women it begins in their late 30s or 40s, but there’s a wide range. The key thing is that symptoms can show up even while your periods still seem “pretty normal.”
That’s one of the reasons it gets missed. People assume menopause is hot flushes and missed periods. But early perimenopause can look a lot more like “I don’t feel like myself.”
1) Your mood feels different and you can’t quite explain why
This one is often the first clue, and it’s also the easiest to brush off.
You might notice you’re more emotional than usual, or more reactive. Maybe your patience is shorter, or you feel unusually teary. Maybe you’re calm on the outside, but internally you’re carrying this constant hum of tension that you can’t switch off.
At work, this can show up in really specific ways. You might dread meetings you’d normally handle fine. Feedback might hit harder than it used to. You might find yourself overthinking messages, second-guessing decisions, or feeling weirdly fragile after a busy day.
And because we’re so used to blaming ourselves, it’s easy to land on “I’m just not coping.”
If your mood has shifted, especially if it’s affecting your relationships, your sleep, or your sense of stability, it’s worth taking seriously. Not in a scary way, but in a “this matters” way.
2) Your brain feels foggier and it starts to knock your confidence
This is one of the most common work-related frustrations I hear from women, and it can feel so unsettling.
You might forget words mid-sentence. You might read the same paragraph three times and still not take it in. You might struggle to organise your thoughts quickly in a meeting, even though you know you’re good at what you do. Or you might feel like you’re working twice as hard just to stay on top of things.
What makes this hard is that it can quickly become a confidence spiral. You notice the fog, you start to worry you’re slipping, so you overcompensate. You stay online longer. You prep more. You push harder. And then your brain gets even more tired.
If you’ve been quietly thinking, “I used to feel sharper than this,” that’s a real signal. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you. It means your body might be asking for a different approach and better support.
3) Your sleep is off, but not in the obvious way
A lot of women don’t label it as “sleep problems” because they can still fall asleep. The issue is what happens after that.
It might be the 3am wake-up, wide awake, mind racing. It might be lighter sleep where you feel like you’re never properly dropping into rest. It might be waking up feeling wired, even though you’re exhausted. Sometimes it’s night sweats, sometimes it’s just a general feeling of being too warm.
And then, unsurprisingly, everything feels harder the next day.
At work, poor sleep doesn’t just make you tired. It makes you less resilient. Your patience shrinks. Your emotional regulation gets wobbly. Your brain fog gets worse. Then you end up doing what most women do, which is reaching for more caffeine and trying to power through, which can make the whole cycle feel even more intense.
If your sleep has shifted and it’s starting to affect your ability to function, it’s not something you have to just tolerate.
4) Your energy crashes feel more intense, and recovery takes longer
This is the part where many women start thinking, “Maybe I’m burning out.”
And yes, burnout can absolutely be part of the picture. But early perimenopause can also show up as a change in your energy baseline. Things you used to do without thinking can start to feel like they cost more.
Maybe you feel fine in the morning, but by mid-afternoon you hit a wall. Maybe travel wipes you out for days. Maybe social plans feel like a lot. Maybe exercise that used to energise you now leaves you flattened. Or maybe you’re still “functioning” on the surface, but it takes everything you have to get through the day.
If you’ve been forcing yourself to keep performing at the same pace, this is your reminder that needing more recovery is not a personal failure. It’s your physiology changing.
5) Your cycle is shifting, but it’s subtle
This one often gets missed because it’s not always obvious.
Your periods might still be coming, but maybe they’re closer together or further apart than they used to be. Maybe the bleeding is heavier. Maybe PMS or PMDD feels different. Maybe your breasts are more tender, you’re getting more headaches, or your mood changes feel sharper at particular points in your cycle.
Sometimes women, especially with PMDD, notice that their “bad week” has expanded into “bad weeks.” Or that the emotional dip they used to get for a day or two now lasts longer and feels more intense.
And because we’re so conditioned to normalise period-related suffering, it gets minimised. But changes in your cycle pattern, especially alongside sleep, mood, and cognition changes, can be a helpful clue.
Okay, but how do you know if it’s perimenopause?
The most supportive way to approach this is to hold it gently, but take it seriously.
Perimenopause can overlap with other issues, and it’s worth ruling out things like thyroid problems, iron deficiency, B12 deficiency, vitamin D deficiency, and mental health concerns, especially if symptoms feel strong or sudden. A good clinician won’t dismiss you with “it’s just stress.” They’ll look at the whole picture.
What helps most is being able to describe what’s changed and how it’s affecting your day-to-day life, including work. If you’ve noticed a clear shift in sleep, mood, energy, concentration, or cycle changes over the last few months, that’s useful information to take to a GP or menopause-informed clinician.
If you want a simple way to frame it, try this:
“I’ve noticed changes in my sleep, mood, and concentration that are affecting work and life, and I’d like to explore whether this could be perimenopause and also rule out other causes.”
A final thought, especially if work is where you’re feeling it most
One of the hardest parts of perimenopause is how invisible it can be.
You can look completely fine and still feel like you’re dragging yourself through the day. You can be successful and capable and still be thinking, “Why can’t I do this like I used to?” You can be the person everyone relies on, while privately wondering if you’re falling apart.
You’re not alone. And you don’t have to wait until you hit crisis point to get support.
Want support without spiralling?
If you’re reading this and thinking, “I just want someone to explain what’s happening without making it scary,” come join our workshop, Perimenopause Without the Panic.
It’s warm, practical, and grounded. You’ll leave with a clearer understanding of what perimenopause can look like (especially at work), what’s worth paying attention to, and small shifts that can make a big difference.